On Winter Solstice, I got a fax of 7 pages, it was the article written by Eddie Lau about Anita Mui,

I asked Eddie Lau,  long time ago, to write an article in memory of Ah Mui for her 1st anniversary of demise, because there is no one who understands Ah Mui better than he.  He replied at that time: [If you have better choice, then don't ask me, because I will feel very bad.]  I know his pain,   though knowing to be cruel I still asked him.

During recent 2 years, Roman, Ah Mui, James Wong left one by one.  All of them were Eddie's good friends, and every time when he was in deepest grief, I would call him.  Besides sending him my regards, also for business,  I asked him to write about them.  Feeling sad, but he always agreed to help.

Since Ah Mui left, he has never been happy, and has to see psychotherapist, and take medicines against depression.  Sometimes, he would say very depressed things, that makes me worry with tears, I keep on telling him: [Eddie, don't think like that, and don't.]  I worry that he would do stupid things.

That night, he told me: [After  had some drink, I went home to write about Ah Mui, didn't know it's heartache or stomachache, felt very bad, almost wanted to wake up the maid.]  Finally he wrote for 2 nights, and had pain for 2 nights.

Her blood moistened his white clothes

He recollected the look when Ah Mui was singing K: [She sat in the high chair, turning around and around, really looked great.  She sang K even better than singing on stage, because there was no pressure at all.]  Half a year ago, Eddie went to the same karaoke house, unexpectedly went to the same room, also sang the song "Moon represents my heart", [You know I feel shy, I won't sing K normally.]

He asked me how I felt after I read his article.  Needless to say, of course I felt grief, especially when I read about he and Ah Mui went to see Leslie for the last time, and Ah Mui said [I'm coming very soon!], how sad it was!

Eddie told me: [When I heard Ah Mui said that, you should know how badly I felt.  After we left Leslie, I cried badly, but no one knew why.]

Reading the part about the scene in funeral home, I felt sadder.  Actually as early as when that happened, Eddie already told me the situation at that time, but when I read about it now, still so shocked.  What he didn't write is that when he was changing shroud for her, he saw her body infiltrate blood, and her blood moistened his white clothes........he could not carry on writing.

Pale pink like peach flowers

For real, how could he, who loved Anita Mui so much, write?

At that time, 4 strong guys who helped in carrying Mui had left, only Eddie Lau and the cosmetician were in the room.  Eddie lifted  the Lama blanket that covered Ah Mui, he saw wounds at her armpits and thighs, believed that the wounds were caused maybe when the funeral home let out her blood, or when they injected antiseptic.  The cosmetician gave him a pair of white rubber gloves, this was not the first time they worked together (he also put on the shroud for Roman himself), the cosmetician asked him: [You are not afraid?] How could he be afraid!

He lifted Ah Mui's head, once lifted her head, he saw "blood water" flowing down her arm, [The room temperature is so low, already 12 days, why her blood still didn't clot?]  He questioned the cosmetician, she said it was because Ah Mui's hemoglobin (???) too low.  He put on the shroud that he made for Ah Mui for her, tied up the belt at the back.  Then he saw "blood water" flowing from her thighs, it's light pink in color, it spread out on the ivory colored shroud, just like peach flowers.  Of course he knew that's blood, but felt that was tears in his heart.  He tightly held Ah Mui's hand, and told her: [Don't feel too sad!]  Sad, actually he himself was .  The cosmetician said: [Mr Lau, you are really full of emotion and righteousness.]

Eddie used gauze to covered up those pink peach flowers, he didn't want others to see them.  Four guys came in to help to put Ah Mui in the coffin, Eddie put in her clothes of 4 seasons and also accompanying flowers.

Last time held her in arms

[I used to hold her in arms, can be said from young to old, every time I held her, she would always turn around to embrace my waist, my neck.  But this time, her body was cold, so stiff, no reaction at all... I never dreamed that I would hold her like that, that feeling...]  He could not find any words to describe it.

Once upon a time, I knew Ah Mui was not happy, I told her: [Call Eddie!] I knew they often talked over the phone, for 2 to 3 hours.  But that time Ah Mui said: [He already took care of me for so many years, I already grew up, don't want to trouble him all the time.]  Actually no matter it was sadness or suffering, Eddie didn't mind to share with her, no matter if she was alive or dead.

His relation with her was closer than anyone else.  She said smilingly that he was a crab of her house, anytime he could walk side way, even when she was in washroom, he could come in, she did her business, he just sat aside chatting with her.

She called herself Mussel Beauty, mimicking Lee Hueng Kam, one hand pressed against her body, and one hand stretched open, really very funny.  Recalling those past funny events that brought lots of tears due to laughter, Eddie always liked to add at the end of the sentence: [That Anita Mui...]  containing infinite love and lingering feeling.

Another night, at Karaoke, Ah Sze (Denise Ho) was singing Si-fu's "Intimate lover", the background scene was Ah Mui's concert for the 20th anniversary of her career, she was wearing the costume made by Eddie, and was dancing.  I thought, at that moment our hearts must be very close, not for any reason, but just for Anita Mui...